4 Thoughts And Then We Go to Penalties ...

Pure brilliance

EXTRA-LONG games mean extra-long thoughts ... 

1. Mythbusters
Ochoa’s heroic performance v. Brazil quickly took on a mythical sort of proportion in Mexican football annals. It was so mythical, in fact, that I think it fooled his own team into thinking their defense was better than it actually was. They had erected quite a fortress in Fortaleza v. Seleção, but more than a little of their success in that 0:0 ‘victory’ came as a result of dreadful Brazilian forward play (more on that in a minute). The game with Croatia was won through having found the courage and conviction to attack, sensing the opportunity to exploit a frustrated opponent. It was easy to praise Mexico’s defensive organization through the first three games, but it wasn’t as simple as having their goalkeeper simply throwing up a wall in front of the goal.

The Mexico-Netherlands game was fascinating, in that the Dutch wanted to counterattack and the Mexicans came up with a good way to handle this in the first half, which was to make Oranje posses the ball for long stretches while El Tri played high, kept the back two lines tight, and also conserved some energy in the 97° heat. Both teams tried to keep something in the tank, so the attacks in the 1st half weren’t too successful, but the Mexicans went forward with more competence and conviction, and when they scored at 48’ it certainly seemed like the right team had the lead.

But then, for some inexplicable reason, the Mexicans completely stopped attacking. I felt as if, had El Tri continued to attack what looked to be a slow Oranje backline, a second goal would’ve likely come. But instead, off comes Dos Santos and El Tri sinks into a defensive shell – and a shell that was way too deep, at that. The last thing they needed to be doing was letting the Dutch bomb away at them, particularly from the wings where all El Tri could do was clear and concede corners. Ochoa saved them once on a set piece, but you cannot concede 11 corners to a team as organized as the Dutch. They will figure it out eventually. By 88’ when Sneijder scored off a beautifully worked set play on a corner, the goal felt somewhat inevitable. Not equalizing would’ve felt unjust.

There was nothing unjust about the penalty at the end. Sure, it was soft – softer than the one in the 1st half which the referee missed – but it was a bad play by all three guys involved in a green shirt who Robben schooled, and like I say, don’t make a bad play and expect the officials to bail you out. The Mexicans argued somewhat, but their hearts weren’t in it. And Mexico were so out of sorts by that point, and their lineup so ragged and unshapely, that playing another 30 minutes of OT could’ve been really unsightly. Holding out for a half hour and going to penalties seemed almost impossible, since the Dutch were all over them, but it also seemed the only way Mexico could possibly win. Honestly, a 3:1 or even 4:1 Oranje final wouldn’t have surprised me if they’d gone another half hour.

In the end, I feel like Mexico outsmarted themselves. They needed to stay on the gas and take the game to the Dutch, which maybe seemed counterintuitive but that’s what was working in this particular game. What happened a week ago doesn’t matter. You have to play the opponent there before you on the pitch. Herrera has done yeoman’s work reviving a team that looked dead as a doornail last fall, and you have to commend the resourcefulness of Oranje, but I really feel like El Tri gave them the chance to be resourceful. It sucked to see them give this game away.


2. Coffee is life
Uruguay did everything right in the first 25’ of their game with Colombia. They controlled tempo, they packed it in tight and gave Colombia nowhere to go. They then made the mistake of happening to be on the field when James decided to show everyone why he will soon be the most expensive player in the world. The first goal, in the .gif at the top of the entry, is absolutely sick.

James gets the 2nd goal as well, and it’s this goal which really speaks to why Los Cafeteros are the most dangerous team in the tournament right now:

Here is the New York Times diagram of the 10-pass sequence which led to that goal. The touches and the movement in this buildup were exquisite, as they moved Uruguay's defense all over the place and eventually got an easy goal:

Not only do the Colombians have the hottest hand in the tourney right now in James, but they attack with dynamism and imagination and, most importantly, selflessness. They share the ball. Now, I’m still not convinced by that defense – once they got the 2:0 lead, they tried to sit back, at which they look about as comfortable as a 17-year-old kid in a misfitting prom tuxedo. But Colombia have so many options going forward that trying to stop them seems like a terrible prospect.

3. Forward Your Résumé to Rio
There are 199,000,000 people in Brazil. Surely one of them can play forward. Scolari may need to hang a HELP WANTED sign in the window. People were wondering why Fred was playing up front for Seleção, given that he has been awful – then we all saw Jô yesterday v. Chile, and Fred suddenly looked extremely appealing. Brazil is built from the back and they have Neymar running the show, of course, but the final third is a swirling, sucking eddy of despair. The Brazilian attack was woful v. a shorter Chilean side with few good defensive options that played out of their minds. Seleção survived the penalty shootout on Saturday, but they certainly didn’t play well, and a similar effort against a more balanced side like Colombia is going to leave them sitting on the beach a few weeks earlier than they were expecting.

4. Enjoyably Awful
Costa Rica and Greece were so boring in the first half that it put the Greek goalkeeper to sleep, which is about the only way to explain how the slow motion, barely struck, roly-poly ball from Brian Ruiz hit the Greek net without anyone even bothering to make a move. Not wanting to stand prosperity, the Ticos promptly got a guy sent off, reducing them to 10 men and suddenly making this game interesting. The three Ticos subs, meanwhile, were hell-bent on using their fresh legs to undo all of the work the weary seven starters were doing. Up a man, the Greeks then threw everything including the kitchen sink at the Ticos for an hour – everything, that is, except a serviceable cross. The Greeks managed an equalizer in the dying minutes of regulation, but their inability to grasp hold of a game where they had fresh legs up front v. a 10-man side which could barely move by the end of the OT was really, really poor. Navas is a fabulous keeper, of course, and he kept the Ticos alive, but the Greeks had about four forwards on the pitch who just seemed to get in each other’s way. They are (in)famous for eking out 1-0 wins where they defend like hell and sneak a goal on a set piece or a counter, and now that I’ve watched them squander about 30 chances over the course of an hour of play, I think I can understand why they play that way. It wasn’t great football in the slightest, but it was wildly entertaining. If there was ever a game that deserved to end on penalties, it was this one.

Penalties
We saw two games decided by penalties this weekend. The Lose hates penalty shootouts on principle, but understands the need for them – Joel Campbell must have run 9½ miles in that game v. the Greeks, and Bryan Ruiz looked somewhat zombified. Asking players to continue under such circumstances does, in fact, become a player safety issue. It’s a shitty way to end a game, but no one can think of anything better.

And as a goalkeeper, trying to stop a penalty is one of the most fun things in the game. The penalty has often been thought of in terms of Game Theory in action – the keeper is trying to decide what to do based upon what (s)he thinks the shooter is going to do, and vice versa – but what makes it fun as a goalkeeper is that there is virtually no pressure upon you. The success rate on penalties runs in the 70-80% range, which means a goalkeeper isn’t expected to make a save at all, so any kind of a result is gravy and it doesn’t matter if you don’t make the save, since you weren’t expected to do so in the first place. And it doesn’t matter if you cheat and the referee orders a retake. You’ll be just as unlikely to save it the next time. All of the pressure is on the shooter.

And this was a situation in the game when I was in my element, in so much as I could mess with people. I would wander out to the penalty spot, stall for time and carry on some sort of suddenly necessary discussion with the referee, talk some shit to the shooter, and just then I would need to tie my shoes, of course, and then I would talk some more shit. Shooters don’t have much to say in response, given that them scoring is no big deal – it’s what they are supposed to do, for goodness sake. I would do almost anything to get the shooter to lose their concentration. Heck, it’s not going to work most of the time, anyway. May as well try it.

I actually stopped 2 of 3 penalties I faced my last year of soccer. I came up with the idea of trying to coax guys to shoot to a particular side. If they were right footed, I wanted them to kick it to my right, so instead of lining up dead center of the goal, I would line up 1’ or so to my left – just enough to make them notice but not so much as to be obvious – then I would dive to the right. That actually worked twice before someone finally figured out what I was doing and kicked it back to my left. 2 out of 3 constituted an outstanding rate of success.

There really isn’t much logic as to which team wins or loses on penalties. The team with the better goalie wins, except when they don’t, which is often. Brazil, Argentina, and Germany usually do really well in the penalty phase; the English and the Dutch always do really badly. Some teams have data on which guys shoot which direction – but other teams have data on how goalkeepers tend to dive. It certainly makes for drama at the end of a game, like it did this weekend, but I’ve always hated the fact that teams reach a point where they are no longer trying to win on the pitch but are simply hoping to win what’s essentially a lottery. Chile played the OT with hopes of going to penalties and lost; for Costa Rica, it worked out just fine. But let’s hope we don’t see any more of those, as they collectively cheapen the tournament.

Because These Are My Thoughts ...

WE’RE on to the Round of 16 now, knockout soccer played with tremendous intensity and, usually, a whole lot of bandages. A large part of advancing in a tourney like this depends upon managing your personnel – you need a lot more of them than you may have first thought, given injuries and suspensions and such. As has been evidenced by the run of play in the first round, with so many late goals and a good number of them by substitutes, you can never have too many good options on your bench. In World Cups of years gone by, teams beset with personnel issues would simply pack it in, play for a draw and hope to advance to the next round on penalties. Given the wealth of attacking talent in this tourney, and also the fact that the high heat just wears people out, the idea of weaker teams holding on for a draw seems extremely unlikely. Which is a good thing, because penalty shootouts suck, an uncreative play sucks.

The knockout phase of this tourney is intriguing because, with such short preparation time between matches, coaching can really come into play. How quickly you come up with a game plan and implement it (and, more importantly, get your players to buy in), is a huge factor. Some adept tactics can steal a game here or there, which is really all that matters at this point. 

Here are the eight matches to come over the next four days, complete with our Why The Lose (WTL) answers as to why I should write about these games. Unlike the preview show, the answers during which were three sentences in length, we’re gonna go with four sentences for each game in the Round of 16. Why four? Why not? That’s how we roll here at In Play Lose World HQ:

Brazil v. Chile
WTL: because the Chileans have an axe to grind, having been knocked out of the World Cup three times by the Brazilians, along with engaging in this nonsense which cost Chile a shot at qualifying for two more; because the Chileans lose to Brazil by being a quixotic lot of swashbucklers who damns the torpedos and then charges ahead – and when Seleção pushes back against you, it usually ends quite badly; because there is a decided lack of confidence in Brazil about this team, which hasn’t been up to the nation’s deservedly lofty standards and which seems to be counting on the fact that it hasn’t lost a relevant match in 39 years in lieu of actually playing well; because Seleção aren’t about to have that streak end – at least not yet, anyway.

Colombia v. Uruguay
WTL: because the Luis Suárez suspension has now brought into play the Uruguayan persecution complex, and also the Liverpool persecution complex (since he will miss about 13 games for his club), and both are really annoying and I’m sick of hearing about them both and hope he takes a long vacation during his time away and gets his head screwed on straight; because the Uruguayans now think everyone is against them, at this point, and are going to be defiant and probably play an ugly game because of it; because Los Cafeteros play with such speed and selflessness and really make the sport a joy to watch; because we all saw the Suárez-less game plan in action v. Costa Rica – Forlán lobs crosses and set piece balls into the box for Cavani and hopes something happens – which actually worked in the first half, but we saw in the second half that the game plan didn’t work so well, and Colombia are way better than Costa Rica.

France v. Nigeria
WTL: because Enyeama has been terrific and has gone a long way to dispelling one of the most annoyingly persistent stereotypes in the sport, which is that African goalkeepers are rubbish; because it’s a good thing Enyeama is so good, since he is going to be busy; because the only real concern about the French is whether or not they lost some of that sharpness by essentially taking the day off v. Ecuador; because that isn’t going to matter against the Super Eagles, who are probably the weakest team to advance to the 16s.

Germany v. Algeria
WTL: because the Algerians have been waiting 32 years to get this chance at revenge, and that may seem silly to drag around since it was forever ago and since most of the Fennec Foxes actually grew up in Algeria, but people have long memories when it comes to this game; because Halilhodzic has shown himself to be a terrific tactician on the bench, and he’s going to need to cook something up in a hurry; because the Germans have put on a similar display to 2010, where they went out and so overwhelmed an opponent in the first game that it masqued some deficiencies elsewhere in the team, and I wonder at what point their opponents are going to figure them out; because while I think the Germans will win, it won’t surprise me at all if the Fennec Foxes make them really uncomfortable.

Netherlands v. Mexico
WTL: because El Tri’s lack of physicality and athleticism up front has to catch up with them at some point; because I’m starting to think that van Gaal is simply smarter than everyone else in this tourney, since he’s managed to get the Dutch to actually play together and also outfoxed a couple of opposing managers in the process; because Rafa v. the Robben & Robin Show is a really bad mismatch which Herrera is going to have to figure out how to cover for, and which is likely to hinder his excellent team defense in doing so; because the Mexican resurrection in Brazil has been great to see, but I really feel like the Oranje do everything in the game that El Tri wants to do and simply does it better.

Costa Rica v. Greece
WTL: because at some point I need to mention that there are three CONCACAF teams in the 16s and that one of the biggest reasons for this is the continued growth of MLS, since having a second quality league in the region affords more players throughout the region the chance to play professionally at a high level and develop their games, whereas in the past you had representatives of the region at the World Cup like the U.S. college kids and the part-time players for the Ticos in 1990 (one of whom I believe was an electrician); because Campbell and Ruiz remind us that having a tandem up front who plays well together is often more important than a tandem who are über-talented; because the Ticos have been running circles around square, slow teams all tournament, and Greece more than fit that bill; because I have no real thoughts whatsoever about Greece other than that they are a cure for insomnia, and would like them to be eliminated as soon as possible.

Argentina v. Switzerland
WTL: because I’ve read an awful lot of writers and pundits still picking Argentina to win the World Cup and I’m wondering if they are watching the same team that I am, or if they are simply enamoured by the name on the jersey, which goes a long way to explaining why if you have Argentina or Germany on your jersey people think you shit rainbows even if you don’t play that well, but if it reads Belgium or France you’re suddenly a disappointment when you’re 3-0 or take a meaningless game off; because Argentina are currently Messi and 10 guys who are a letter short of Messi, but it’s been good enough so far against overawed and underaggressive opposition; because the Swiss have been all over the place, and have been so schizophrenic that you don’t know what to expect from minute to minute; because if the Swiss figure out where they are supposed to be on the field for 90’ or so, this has the potential to be the most entertaining game of the Round of 16.

Belgium v. United States
WTL: because one of the things which would help the U.S. is if they stopped treating the left side of the field like a toxic waste dump, given that the Germans figured this out pretty quickly and clogged the right side of the pitch and took away as much of the Johnson/Jones runs and combination play as they could, and surely the Belgians can figure out to do the same thing as well; because assuming the Belgians can figure that out is questionable, since Wilmots has looked out of his league coaching v. Cappello and Halilhodzic, and Klinsmann is a better tactician than either of them and also has better players than those two coaches do; because I think that what the U.S. wants to do in this game is more or less what the Belgians want to do as well, which is play up-tempo and try to pressure through the midfield and down the flanks; because unfortunately, when two teams want to do basically the same thing, the one with better players generally wins, and also the one with more of them, and that’s the Belgians.

I will gladly, willingly be wrong on the last one. Please don’t take any of this to the bank, and always remember that gambling is a sin.

Un, Deux, Trois, Quatre ...

Important safety tip: Never do this ever

ON to the Round of 16 we go! And yes, the language in the title of this blog entry tells you which team has looked the best so far, irrelevant 0:0 draws with Ecuador notwithstanding.

1. Pragmatism in Motion
Both the U.S. and the Germans played extremely cautiously today – befitting two teams needing only a draw to advance. The slick pitch in Recife seemed to take the edge off the American game plan, as the ball just seemed to run away from them on every touch and made any sort of a transition attack difficult. The Germans, meanwhile, played incredibly slowly and took very few risks, not wanting to let their slow backline get exposed. After they got the goal, the Germans basically didn't do anything. It didn't make for the most attractive game, but it is a results-oriented business and nothing going on down in Brasilia made any more urgency necessary. I'll take a 0:1 loss under the circumstances. Bring on the Belgians, but we best be careful what we wish for ... then again, a number of the Belgians said they would much prefer playing the U.S. instead of the Germans, so maybe it's they who need to be careful what they wish for.

2. Thank You for Imploding
Fortunately for the U.S., Ghana was bound and determined to self-destruct. Boateng and Muntari being sent home – one apparently for verbally abusing the coach, the other a Ghanian FA executive – was the last in a series of divisive, behind-the-scenes issues. The Black Stars were very flat against Portugal, and probably should've been down more than 1:0 at the half. Then again, it was probably appropriate that they were losing because they had scored upon themselves. Gyan's lovely header (and, no doubt, hearing the score in Recife) brought about 15' of spark, but it didn't amount to anything, and then came the truly dreadful piece of goalkeeping above. It's probably not a good idea to punch the ball directly to Ronaldo in the center of the penalty area. Portugal probably should've won by even more than they did. At this point, any result other than a Ghana loss would've been entirely undeserved.

And One More Moment of Noise About Ghana ...
The Black Stars got screwed by the draw. No doubt. Honestly, after watching the mess that was on display in Groups C, E, F and H, it seems a little cruel that a team is going home that's capable of playing the way the Black Stars did v. the Germans. This team has so much talent. But, really, they did it to themselves. Almost all goals they allowed were owing to sloppy defending, particularly on set pieces. Any sort of cross was something of a harrowing experience. The future should be reasonably bright for the Black Stars, who followed up 2010's successes by fielding one of the youngest sides in Brazil and they didn't appear to have missed that much of a step. But obviously, there are politics and backroom issues needing to be dealt with. Half the team seemed to be playing to win today, the other half seemed to be playing to get someone fired. It's obviously a big mess, and it's doubtful they currently have people in charge who can clean it up.

3. If it's Belgium, the Game Must Be Next Tuesday
You can't read much into the Belgian performance today, given that they rested about 6-7 starters. Even so, it was probably good for them to have to play a man down the entire 2nd half, because at that point the Belgians had to actually care. This team has been the enigma of the World Cup so far. They haven't played worth a damn, yet they're 3-0. Sure, the group wasn't very good, but the Belgians had to play terrible to make those games even close, and still couldn't lose.

I don't know what to make of the U.S.-Belgium match up in the 16s. Every time I see Mertens make a run down the flank, I think the U.S. will be in trouble. Every time I see him flub a cross, I think the U.S. will be just fine. The Belgians have tremendous midfielders, but the final third has been a wreck, and you can find holes in that defense if you stay away from Kompany. The Belgians positively mauled the U.S. last summer in a friendly, but they seem to have lost that edge and that attitude they carried. They certainly look beatable. If I were the U.S., I would try to get on them early, that's for sure. The Red Devils have so many players on their bench that they can just wear you out with their numbers. Fortunately, I think the U.S. conserved some energy today, because the Belgian starters will be well-rested and I suspect both sides will want to play very, very fast.

4. Outfoxed
I don't think they have much of a chance against Germany, nor do I know what they will try to do in the game, but Algeria will almost certainly come up with a solid game plan. This is a savvy team, well-coached and well-prepared, and they've shifted shapes repeatedly in this tourney to suit their opposition. First they pack it in and frustrate the Belgians, then they explode against the woful Korean defense. They definitely know how to get results. The Fennec Foxes also helped bring some respect back to African football after the Ghanian collapse and the Greek tragedy that was the Côte d'Ivoire the other day. They will make the Germans work for it, I suspect.

And Now Some Moments of Noise ...
Portugal gets some props for still playing hard. The tournament basically ended for them in the first game, when they got blown up by the Germans. They were old, slow, beat up, and they really struggled to keep pace in the heat. That they took four points from the last two games was commendable, and definitely a bit surprising. Without a healthy Ronaldo, this team isn't much to speak of, of course, and even Ronaldo at about 60% was good for a brilliant play to save the game vs. the U.S. and a pretty dominant display v. Ghana. (He probably should've had a hat trick.) The Portuguese seem to spend too much time watching Ronaldo. On more than one occasion, guys differed to him, waiting for him to make a play instead of making it themselves. This team needs a pretty big overhaul. Bento insists he will not resign as coach, but they've struggled pretty badly when it comes to qualifications in the last few years. Unlike Messi, Ronaldo is clearly human, and he ran out of miracles in Brazil.

It does not take much to explain where the problems with South Korea lie. Behold the first goal they allowed v. Algeria over the weekend:

What the shit was that?

And here are the Fennec Foxes running a 4-on-7 break. Count the number of statues dressed in red:

Like I say, it is not too hard to see where the problem is with this team. They got caught flat footed and ball watching again today vs. the Belgians. The Korean defense needs a lot of help. Then again, they could not find a goal v. a 10-man Belgian JV today, so the offense is not in great shape, either. Oh boy.

Speaking of the offense not being in great shape, Russia's attack verged on completely dysfunctional at times during this World Cup. Cappello has been given the keys to the Russian program between now and 2018, and his focus should definitely be up front. They were well-organized and defended stoutly, but couldn't score a lick. It might also help to upgrade the goalkeeping. Along the howler of a goal v. the Koreans, Akinfeev flapped pretty badly at the Algerian equalizer today. Considering that they only conceded three goals in three games, those goalkeeping errors undid a lot of good work by the defense.

There were times these past couple of weeks where it seemed the Russians were far more busy planning for 2018 than paying attention to 2014. In terms of logistics, I suspect the 2018 World Cup will come off relatively well. Unlike the white elephants in Manaus and Brasilia, all of the facilities being built in Russia are infrastructure improvements the Russian game can genuinely use. It's definitely a bit strange trying to prepare yourself to host a World Cup, however. You just don't have enough meaningful games in the build-up, and it's really hard to judge your side. I would imagine Cappello will keep going young here as Euro 2016 qualifying begins, but the Russians don't have a whole much success on which to build. Good challenge for a coach, though. Let's see if the Russian FA will show some patience and let Cappello attempt to craft a formidable side.

Buy 4 thoughts, get 1 free

“Messi is from Jupiter” – Nigeria coach Stephen Keshi

1. Xherdan Shaqiri
The 16s now feature a head-to-head battle between the world's greatest soccer player and the world's greatest soccer name. Xherdan Shaqiri's hat trick gave the Swiss a 3:0 win over Honduras and advances them to play Messi's Argentina, which is potentially quite an interesting game. Shaqiri is the star of this new Swiss side, many of whom played for a World Junior championship team from several years ago. The spritely Swiss have a wonderful, youthful, almost naïve sort of quality to the way that they play, which got them into trouble v. France but has served them well otherwise. They should be intimidated by Messi & Co., but they might just be young enough not to know it. And Argentina's 3:2 win over the Super Eagles today didn't exactly assauge any doubts about their lack of defensive prowess.

2. Fly High, Super Eagles
Even though I think they are going to get smushed by France in the 16s, I would sort of like to see the Super Eagles win, and keep winning, and win the whole tournament, because every time that the Super Eagles win on the pitch, those who choose to commit unspeakable acts of violence within their country – piggybacking upon an event with as high a profile as the World Cup to raise their own profile in the process – will lose just a little bit more.

Let's have a few moments of noise ...
In no sport are coaches hired to be fired moreso than in soccer. But in the case of both Honduras and Iran, their managers quickly tendered their resignations upon being knocked out of the competition, even though it isn’t clear there was any real disappointment in their performance. In fact, I suspect both coaches – Fernando Suárez in Honduras, Carlos Queiroz in Iran – came to realize that it was time to move on simply because they had maxed out all they could accomplish.

Honduras were quite negative in their play in Brazil, and no one there is mourning their departure, but qualifying for a second consecutive World Cup was a notable achievement. Even so, this is a team whose best players are older and who possesses a rather straight forward game plan that isn’t particularly difficult for modern, sophisticated opponents to figure out. Replicating their success and reaching Russia in 2018 may be a taller order than Suárez wants to try to tackle. After you’ve overachieved twice, you’re no longer overachieving. At that point success is expected, sometimes unrealistically. Success often serves to set one up for future failure.

Queiroz leaving is definitely a blow to Iran. He was moments away from stealing a point from Argentina and they played Nigeria to a 0:0 draw. But playing to a 0:0 draw seemed to be all that they were capable of accomplishing, and having to chase a victory today v. the Bosnians wasn’t a recipe for success. Queiroz would argue, of course, that he didn’t really have the talent at his disposal to do more than assemble a stout, organized, ultra-defensive side. He also ran up against the usual Iranian problem – politics. Soccer is a game of the people in Iran, whose government is wary of anything which falls into the realm of the general public. National team success is good for national morale, but too much success encourages exceesive acts of free-expression – the football grounds being about the only true venue for such in the country. Authorities want the Meili to do well, but not too well. As such, Queiroz found his efforts underfinanced and undermined – stories circulated about how they didn’t have enough jerseys to be able to do the ceremonial swaps at the end of games – and international sanctions have crippled his ability to find quality warm-up opponents. There is only so long that you work under such conditions before you decide that you just don’t want to put up with it any longer.

The third team going home after today – Ecuador – needed a win today, but were decidedly underwhelming in a 0:0 game with a French team that made six changes and had nothing at all to play for. Ecuador is kind of like any number of teams you see every year in the NCAA basketball tournament, in that they have enough athleticism to get some results, but they don’t appear to do any faze of the game particularly well. They were playing with a burden in Brazil after the death of Christian Benítez, who was one of their best players. Enner Valencia admirably filled his role up front, scoring all three of Ecuador’s goals in the tourney. But La Tri really didn’t show very much. I thought they would be better than this.

3. Thinking back to yesterday
Uruguay are attempting to circle the wagons around Luis Suárez after his latest attempt at channeling his inner vampire. I can understand them publicly expressing defiance to some extent, since they know damn well that they’re going to everyone’s enemy come Saturday v. Colombia and are looking to hunker down and foster a bunker mentality. When thrust into the role of the villain, it’s often a wise idea to embrace it. But I find a lot of those comments too stupid to be believed, the best of which having been offered up by displaced team captain Diego Lugano, who apparently has grown tired of answering questions about why he got schooled by Costa Rica and has less mobility than a bag of wet sand. In keeping with the spirit of cannibalism, the Italians are now in the obligatory process of eating their own. Couldn’t happen to a better bunch, to be honest. The fact is that the Italians won a World Cup in 2006 with cynical play amid a domestic match-fixing scandal while fielding one of the least likable sides to ever claim the title. Questioning the commitment of the young players who may actually bring back some credibility to Serie A and make people care again about Italian football is certainly amusing. De Rossi and Buffon may as well tell those kids to take the soccer ball and get off their lawns while shaking their canes.

4. Thinking about tomorrow
This has been a bad few days for the Ghanians. Reports are that they went so far as to threaten a boycott of the game tomorrow v. Portugal over not being paid yet by the Ghana FA, at which point Ghana's president personally guaranteed the payments – and $3,000,000 in cash was promptly shipped to Brazil, while Ghana's FA asked for an advance on their share of the Brazil prize pool. A good rule of thumb when you hear about these disputes with federations is that the players are always right. No one has heard “the cheque is in the mail” quite as often as an African footballer. And the urgency to have this payment issue resolved almost certainly came about when The Telegraph in the U.K. broke this story over the weekend, in which it alleges that the president of Ghana's FA agreed on a figure of about £170,000 per match to have Ghanian sides participate in matches that would be fixed ahead of time by gamblers. Now, none of the players are implicated in this – it is something allegedly going on at an administrative level – but this guy is, in essence, your boss, and if you're a Black Star, why would you want to put up with this shit? The Black Stars need to beat Portugal tomorrow, and this sort of distraction certainly does not help.

5. Thinking about tomorrow some more
“The U.S. is known to give all they have in every single game, otherwise Mexico wouldn't be here.”
– Jurgen Klinsmann

Spoken like a true member of USA FC – speak to American pride and resiliency while also trolling El Tri a little. Nah, there isn’t be any sort of collusion going on in the Germany game.

4 thought provoking day, to be sure

James is too good

1. Appetite for Self-Destruction
Luis Suárez needs to not be playing soccer for a long, long time. Today was the third time he’s bitten an opponent. The third time! How stupid to do you have to be to do that? Given that he’s served 17 games’ worth of suspensions for the first two times he did that, you think he would get the message. The Dutch and English FAs had to deal with him previously, but now he’s messing with a far bigger and badder dude on the block with FIFA – and FIFA doesn’t like to be embarrassed. Which is precisely what happened. On the pitch, it could be argued that this has been the best World Cup of all time, with lots of beautiful, free-flowing play and a lack of cynicism and thuggery. But now you have to deal with a P.R. nightmare, because the ultimate enfant terrible in the game did something this utterly disgusting and revolting. And he did it FOR THE THIRD TIME! Who can protect him, at this point? Liverpool has had to deal with his biting and race-baiting already. As good as he is, is Suárez really someone they can count on, or even want to count on? And If I’m one of the Uruguayans, I’m furious. They just scrounged out a 1:0 win over the Italians to live another day, only to have their best player decide to play Dracula in front of God and all humanity. Uruguay did very well to repair its’ somewhat dubious reputation in 2010 with a 4th-place finish achieved through resourceful and spirited play – but that was the classy Forlán’s team, as he ran the show and they went along with him for the ride, and even then it was somewhat checkered by the Suárez handball v. Ghana. And now, thanks to Suárez, Colombia is going to have an awful lot of fans come Saturday.

2. IT MUST BE A CONSPIRACY!
I think it was all of about :10 after the final whistle that I first started seeing the Italian conspiracy theorists come crawling out of the woods. The nation that first added the flop in the box to the game’s repertoire don’t make for very sympathetic figures. They lose 0:1 to a Latin American side in a game with a Latin American referee and OH MY GOD IT MUST BE MATCH FIXING!!! The Mexican referee certainly had his hands full, given that this game pitted a pair of pudgy divas falling easier than a tomato can bought off to take a dive at the Friday Night Fights. Clearly, he blew it on the Suárez thing – one guy has teeth marks on his shoulder and the other guy is holding his teeth. The red card to Marchisio was the other Italian point of contention, and that’s a difficult one. Given the situation and the spot on the field – a 50-50 ball just outside the Uruguayan box in a 0:0 game – the play looked more clumsy than malicious. It certainly didn’t rise to the level of the red card in the Croatia-Mexico game yesterday, where Rebic just decided he was going to take someone out for the fuck of it. But having said that, you still have to be in control of your body out there, and by the letter of the law, a studs-up strike to the knee area deserves a red card. I think it might have been a harsh decision, myself, but I can understand the red. The black-and-white of the rules always fades to grey during the speed of the play, and it’s too much to ask referees to judge intent. One thing I’ve noticed in pretty much every sport, however, is that if you make a bad play, you should never expect the official to bail you out.

And now a moment of noise ...
After this game was over, the Azzurri had a resign-off: first coach Cesare Prandelli resigned at this press conference, then the head of the Italian FA said he would resign in August and that he hoped Prandelli would reconsider. Prandelli’s interesting, dual playmaker passing game looked great at the Euros in 2012 and the Confed Cup in 2013, but as we’ve seen throughout the tournament, possession football is getting swept aside in favour of athleticism in the middle and speed on the wings. Once DeRossi got hurt, and Pirlo was by himself in that playmaker role, the system stopped working, Balotelli couldn’t get the ball (and didn’t do much when he finally did), and the Italians could do little more than revert to some of the same bad habits that saw them off early in 2010. This feels like the wrong team at the wrong tourney at the wrong time. And sure, the Brazilian climate seems to be wearing out everyone from a northern latitude in this tourney, but the Italians had a taste of it last summer at the Confed Cup. They had to have some idea what was coming. They spent the last two games looking like they were stuck in quicksand. In the end, they seemed wofully ill-prepared for the conditions they faced, so maybe the resignations aren’t uncalled for.

3. Sorry about the locusts
Greece scored two goals, so clearly the apocalypse is upon us. I really didn't think it was possible. The fact is, however, that they were the better team in the game today, and the win was deserved. And yes, I’m surprised to write that. They hit the woodwork three times and kept the Ivorian keeper busy. If anything, the Ivorian equalizer was due to a moment of very un-Greek sort of play where they got caught too far upfield. I have to give them some props when it’s due, and this bodes pretty well for the Costa Ricans in the 16s. The Ticos have running circles around slow, plodding opposition all tourney, and the Greeks certainly fall into that category.

And now a moment of noise ...
Of all the early exits from Brazil, Côte d’Ivoire is probably the biggest waste. This team got caught in difficult groups in 2006 and 2010, but Group C was set up just perfectly for them, and they still couldn’t capitalize. Even worse, they self-destructed: Les Elephants gave up five goals in Brazil, two of which were due to giveaways by the backline and a third being the crushing, last-second penalty today v. the Greeks after they’d chased down the game and equalized, which was the needed result to advance. There was a lack of focus and lack of attention to detail, plain and simple. I have no doubt that everyone involved is going to be getting fired after this – apparently no one involved like the coach, not the players nor the media nor anyone else, so he’s surely gone. [EDIT: He resigned promptly after the match.] Côte d’Ivoire has had far and away the best talent in Africa for a decade, but that doesn’t mean squat if you don’t play as a team, which they seemed to do for all of about 20’ in three games in Brazil, and now that run is pretty much done. Disappointing. And this is an old team, a team which should’ve had enough experience by now to know better.

4. Instant Offense
The Colombians were playing for nothing today, and it showed in the first half, as they put out a rather lazy 45’ and really got outplayed by Japan. But all it took was a flash of play here or there from James & Co. in the second half and that settled that. Quick strike capability can be hard to come by in soccer and, as has been shown by Messi and Ronaldo over the weekend, there really is no way to answer it. The Colombians are like lightning out there, able to seemingly turn nothing into something at any instant. I would like to think that talent is going to win out over pragmatism in the 16s, because a Suárez-less Uruguay is almost certainly going to rely upon guile and defensive tactics to stay afloat. For the good of the game, let us all hope Los Cafeteros hammer them. After that, the prospect of a Brazil-Colombia quarterfinal is awfully appealing.

And now a moment of noise ...
Japan needs a striker. Get this team a striker, please. Losing 1:4 to Colombia was something of an unfair scoreline, given that they really did play a good first half. Colombia gave the Japanese space to operate, which is a very bad idea, and the result was a very pretty goal manufactured by Honda and Okazaki. The Japanese are great technicians and if they can keep the game on the carpet, they can really thrive, but they lack any sort of physicality up front. Their attempts to unlock the 10-man Greek wall were laughably awful. With a serviceable striker up front, this team would really be a threat. As it stands, they can chew up pretty much anything put forth in Asia, but they’re still being held back.

1,2,3 o'clock, 4 o'clock thoughts

The first good thing a Norwich City player did all year

1. Situational soccer
The third game of the group stage is about the situation as much as, if not more than, the opponent. This is why no one really game plans all that much in advance for the third game. Your tactics are entirely determined by the result you have to achieve – which will be determined by the first two games – and then there are issues with injuries and suspensions and the like you have to deal with. The Dutch pretty much demonstrated how it's done today. They needed a draw to win Group B, and Van Persie was suspended, so the Dutch backed it up, stalked the midfield and tried to slow the pace way down. Chile had the ball for huge amounts of time but never could find any sort of a functional offensive rhythm. They are an aggressive and imaginative side, yet they're at sixes and sevens when they cannot get out and run. In a slow game, the Dutch were a terrible matchup for the Chileans, since they are the shortest team in the tourney (Dutch score on a header on a set piece), and their back line is held together with duct tape and string (Dutch score on Robben counterattack).

2. This couldn't really happen, could it?
By winning Group B, the bracket opens up remarkably nicely for Oranje, playing Mexico in the 16s with the winner getting a somewhat underwhelming C/D pairing in the 8s. Could it be that the fate decreed by the football gods will end up coming to fruition? Brazil gets Chile in the 16s and, well, they haven't lost a meaningful game at home since 1975, so good luck with that, Chileans.

3. El Tri:1
Not that Mexico is going to go quietly in the 16s. My concerns about El Tri going into this game today stemmed from a) an anemic offense; and b) trying to contain Mandzukic, who is a bear. Well, a) the Mexicans have suddenly become quite adept on the set pieces; and b) Mandzukic wasn't a factor because the Croatians seemed to hardly ever have the ball in a useful position. I like the way the Mexicans are defending with pressure, trying to keep possession and playing to their strengths. Herrera has brought some discipline to the attack and his move to bring back Marquez to keep order, which I wondered about at the time, has paid off nicely. I appreciated the positivity from El Tri in a game that seemed, at times, to be verging on going very negative in tone. Once they had the pace to their liking, and realized the Croatians couldn't keep up, they went from playing for a draw to playing for a win to playing for a big enough spread to win the group! Oh, yes, and Graham Zusi says "you're welcome" once again.

4. One Last Go
It was strange watching the Spaniards take one last victory lap today. They were quite melancholy during their 3:0 thumping of Australia. All of the guys who scored v. the 'roos – Villa, Torres, Mata – knew that it was almost certainly the last time wearing that jersey, of course. This generation of Spaniards have always been classy, savvy and smart on the pitch and a joy to watch. They were so damn good that I guess I always thought it would come to end for them in some epic sort of clash where they were finally vanquished, rather than in this strange sort of slow-motion spectacle.

And now a moment of noise for ...
Every time I see Croatia play, I see guys who are great on the ball, guys who make very fancy sideways passes, and guys who seem to have a remarkably large chip on their shoulder for no apparent reason. (They also seem to keep having crowd problems and stuff like this, which isn't going to win you many friends.) There is always this element of nastiness seemingly simmering just beneath the surface of their games. When the red card came out late today, it was about the least surprising development imaginable. Individual talent certainly didn't mesh into coherent football v. Mexico, and other than Perisic, who scored the late goal and nearly got a second, they capitulated after El Tri got the lead. That third goal they allowed was ridiculous. I watched two of their qualification matches, one where they got manhandled by the Belgians and a 0:0 draw v. 10-man Iceland, and it just seemed like they should be a better team than that. Well, apparently not.

Special appearance by The Good Guys:

You cannot stop the Cougar flag. You can stop the football team from time to time, and usually you can stop the basketball team simply by letting them miss an open shot, but you cannot stop the flag.

Now With Even More Thoughts

Mr. Jones

1. Big picture
The U.S. needs a result v. Germany, but they aren't desperate and they don't need a miracle. Most of the scenarios which could play out favour them to advance, in fact. A draw will work. A Portugal-Ghana draw will work. A Portugal win over Ghana will probably work. A U.S. win will ... wait, the U.S. won't beat Germany, will they? Well, why the hell not? Is it a tall order to get a result from a game with Germany? Sure it is, but this tourney gets hard at some point for everyone. The U.S. are still in a far, far better position than the two teams below them in the standings in Group G, and we all need to keep that in mind. 4 pts. from two games is, all things considered, pretty good. It just sort of sucks how they got to 4 pts ...

2. Damn You Ronaldo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The U.S. were naïve and got caught upfield at the end of the game, and Bradley's migraine-inducing run of annoyingly bad play continued when he got dispossessed to start the Portuguese counterattack, but that pass from Ronaldo reminds you why it is that he is arguably the greatest player in the world. Go back and watch that play. There aren't many guys in the world who can make that play in that moment. Honestly, I can think of about two, both of which have saved their respective teams in the past two days. We all want to hate on CR7, but that pass was simply sensational.

3. Best game of the tourney
That was sensational soccer. Portugal got a garbage goal, a brilliant goal, and hung on the best they could with a struggling side. The U.S. did what good teams do when they trail – figure out the weak spots in the opposition, attack it, and have their best players step up and make plays. Jermaine Jones has been a Best XI sort of player in this tourney so far. He, Johnson, and then Yedlin absolutely wrecked Portugal down that flank. The last-ditch equalizer sucks, of course, but when you take part in what's easily the best of game of what's easily the best World Cup in decades, it stings a little bit less. No matter what happens Thursday, the U.S. has shown that it can play this game at an incredibly high and competitive level. And I do think it's going to get better from here. Something to theorize about in future posts.

4. Strange brew
The Belgians have too many good players, and Marc Wilmots is having a hard time finding XI to play well together as a unit. The Belgians have a rock of a keeper, two forwards and about 18 midfielders on their roster. They're built to run and play improv, street football – and they're a little mystified by teams which won't let them do it. The Russians were well organized today and Cappello really outcoached Wilmots, whose tactical choices didn't make a whole lot of sense: Lukaku isn't a post-up type forward, while 6'4" Fellaini was roaming aimlessly 30 yds. from goal. But the Belgians have probably the deepest bench in the tourney – all three goals they've scored have been after 70' and scored by the subs – and they outlasted the Russians, who ran out of gas. Belgium is on to the 16s and I suspect their last game v. South Korea will be something of a lab experiment. The Belgians have nothing to play for, so they may as well tinker and see if they can brew up a concoction with a more pleasant taste.

5. Bonus thought
Just when you think that a game is going to suck, Algeria and South Korea score six goals and run up and down and play one of the most fun games of the tournament. Granted, the Korean defense was about as terrible as I've seen in a World Cup in years, but props to the Fennec Foxes for taking the initiative and charging straight ahead. It's an odd team Algeria has, in that so many of their players are products of the French academy system, and given that this 4:2 win seemingly came out of nowhere – they've always been a cautious, tenacious, scheming lot, and then they were playing great, energetic football today. It sort of makes you wonder why they've kept that under wraps for so long. Let's hope they do the same against the Russian snooze machine on Thursday.

6. Another bonus thought
Since there are already rumours and rumblings that the fix might be in for next Thursday's game, since both the U.S. and Germany only need a draw, here is a more detailed story from The Guardian of 1982, which involves both the Algerians and Germans and which I mentioned in the preview blog. I do think both teams will play to win Thursday, but caution will be the order of the day, and if it's 0:0 after an hour, why would either side take the risk from there? You'll look far stupider putting yourself in a position to lose than if you choose to take a point. Just throwing that out there.

I Like 4 Thoughts and I Cannot Lie

How do you stop this?

1. Words Fail
Lionel Messi saved the game, the World Cup, the Argentine F.A. and maybe the whole of the Argentine government with this stoppage-time goal. And look at this play. The Iranians defend it well 2-deep, the keeper has a good angle. Messi is NOT OPEN! There are no words for this. Words fail. They just give up.

2. The better team lost
I do have plenty of words for Messi's team, however. Words like flat and immobile and uncreative and hideous and bad. It set up to be a fascinating game, since the field seemed to slope in one direction. Iran parked the bus from the outset – hell, it was more like a bus, a van, a burro and several mopeds. Argentina couldn't unlock it, so they seemed to try to coax the Iranians out of the shell by giving them more space with the ball – and exposed the fact that their back line isn't very good in the process, a fact which Iran couldn't quite take advantage of. All of a sudden, Iran started playing to win, and Romero saved Argentina's bacon with some excellent goalkeeping.

Argentina are something of a mess right now. They are playing too slow, and there is no movement. Everyone is standing around waiting for Messi to do something – which, I guess, is working right now.  A more ruthless opponent would've taken the Argentines apart today, and still might eventually, although they have time to figure it out. Argentina are lucky they have such an easy group and will likely have an easy matchup in the 16s – the best of their likely opponents, the Swiss, looked so disorganized yesterday that I cannot imagine them meticulously sticking to a game plan quite like the Iranians did today. Iran outplayed Argentina, outsmarted them and deserved better. But that's football. The better team loses a lot of the time.

3. Opportunity knocks
If you'd told me ahead of time that a win in the 2nd game v. Portugal would put the U.S. through to the 16s, I would've taken it. It wasn't the ideal result for the U.S. today, when Ghana and Germany drew 2:2, but the fact that the U.S. doesn't have to go chasing a result in their final game is near ideal.

And that was one helluva game today. The 2:2 draw is always a satisfying scoreline, implying an exciting and even match, and 2:2 was about the right result for what might've been the best all-around game of the tournament. Ghana and Germany played the second half of this one like a couple of impatient prizefighters who got tired of feeling each other out, said the hell with it and started throwing haymakers. Klose confirmed his place as the world's greatest 2-yard striker with his typical 2-yard strike where everyone else does the work for him and he taps it in, and the Black Stars offered up quite a bit for the U.S. to take note of ahead of the Germany game, exposing the German backline as the slow bunch of plodders that they are. Germany wants to play up tempo but simply can't do it. I'd like to see the U.S. take the game to them next week, regardless of what sort of result the Americans may need.

Bottom line – the opportunity is there for the U.S. tomorrow against a weakened, wounded Portugal and they had best not screw this up.

4. Open your eyes, ref!
Bosnia got screwed. No two ways about it. The goal called back was a terrible piece of officiating, and the disputed Nigerian goal, which featured a possible foul during the buildup, was somewhat iffy. Losing 1:0 under such circumstances, and also being eliminated from the tourney because of it, was a bitter pill for the Dragons to swallow. But part of what makes the game so compelling, in fact, is the inherent cruelty of it. The game is rife with grey areas and paradoxes. It's always spoken far more about human nature than other sports, simply because the results often do not seem just. And it's no consolation, of course, but the guys who officiated that game almost certainly won't be working any more games after the first round, given that they so drastically affected the outcome. Having said that ...

And now a moment of noise ...
Bosnia had their chances. Lots of them, in fact. Both teams did, and it was only some excellent goalkeeping on either side that kept it 1:0. Dzeko's touches seemed to get successively worse from the moment his goal was called back, and the Dragons seemed completely dead by the end of the game in the sauna that is Cuiaba. This is a weird team that is definitely a work in progress. They basically played a 2-7-1 formation in this game, lacking any sort of decent fullbacks. It still doesn't make any sense to me why they didn't play Ibisevic with Dzeko the whole game, but perhaps they felt the need to be a bit more cautious since depth was obviously a problem. Still, it seemed like they were a bit too cautious in this tournament. The Dragons are extremely young and are great with the ball at their feet, so there seems to be a bright future ahead. Combine this game with the bizarro own goal 2' into the game with Argentina, you can't help but feel like the Dragons were somewhat snakebit.

You Will Have 4 Thoughts and You Will Like It!

When you can do stuff like this, you are not a fluke

1. Ticos II: The Sequel!
I thought that Costa Rica were going to take some points from Group D, 1-2 pts. maybe, but certainly not six. Yet here they are with 6 pts. and a trip to the 16s and those 6 pts. were entirely deserved. Against both Uruguay and Italy, the better team won, and the Ticos were the better team. Costa Rica is not a fluke. They are sound on defense, yet they are not overly defensive. They want to possess the ball and use their great team speed. They play very well together, using that chemistry and continuity to make up for not having the superstar talent of their opponents (although both Campbell and Ruiz play high level European football, and Navas is an underrated goalkeeper who is having a great tourney). They have flat out, straight up, outplayed and outsmarted two élite opponents. CONCACAF is having a great World Cup so far, and have the realistic possibility of landing three sides in the 16s. We will discuss the reasons for that later, assuming the U.S. and Mexico hold up their end of the bargain.

2. Azzurri Worry
The Ticos clearly feel much more at home in the Brazilian climate than their opponents. The Italians looked completely gassed in the second half of the game today. No matter how many forwards they brought on to try and equalize, there was no spark. Balotelli's touches were heavy, but the rest of the Italians seemed a bit soft. Among the signs of unfocused play today were the fact they were caught offsides something like 11 times v. Costa Rica. I wonder if the game in Manaus really did take a heavy toll on them – both they and the English were pretty much dead by the 70' mark of that game. Italy's team fitness was definitely a factor coming into this tourney, and there was no way for them to properly prepare for the heat and humidity of Brazil, which is nothing like any of them have ever known. Of course, the Italians have also bitched about the conditions more than anyone, which isn't surprising. Shut up about the heat, guys, it's just as bad on the other side of the pitch. While I've never been a fan of Italian football (about the only thing I don't love about Italy, which is among my favourite places on earth), this new team has got my attention with their emphasis on playmaking, Were this tournament in a more friendly clime, I would think the Italians would be a favourite, but as it is, the Italians just seem to be getting slower and slower as this tourney goes on, and they are rapidly getting left behind.

And now a moment of noise ...
The win by Costa Rica means that England go home. Their World Cup lasted for all of about six days. And, quite honestly, they deserve it. England has a fundamental problem – they aren't very good. Look at that roster for a moment, and ask yourself if there is a single player in the starting XI that you would actually want on your team. Who would you want? I wouldn't want any of them. This team doesn't pass well and they're slippery in the back. So many of the goals they allow are plays where the defense just loses sight of a man entirely. It borders on inept.

I felt that when England in 2010 finished second to the U.S. in their group, it wasn't an upset. There were lots of typical English players like Gerrard and Terry and Lampard and Rooney with limited games and 1-dimensional profiles on that team. Sure, they have a high workrate, but everyone does at this level. England always seem to lack versatility, and if you take away whatever it is that they do well, they aren't able to come up with something better. This team was better than the 2010 squad, and had far worse results, in the end – but it came against better opponents, and the 2010 results weren't so great.

We had a discussion today on another thread about the EPL – an argument being put forth that having so many foreign players in the league hurts the English game as a whole. This argument is rubbish. Having the greatest collection of players in the world in your country should, in fact, raise the standard of your domestic game, since the greatest players also bring with them skills to be copied and ideas to be shared. Over time, your native players should theoretically improve and raise their own bar. It's certainly worked that way in Italy and Spain in the past, but that simply hasn't happened in England.

They need to blow the whole thing up in England, go young and take their lumps and see what happens. They haven't had a team worth getting excited about since 1998 – which they fucked up, anyway. This latest generation of players haven't achieved anything, nor have they been even close. As for those who support them, well, if England fails to meet your standards, your standards probably need to be lowered.

3. Vive Le France!
OK, show of hands. Who wants to play France in the knockout stage? Anyone? Anyone? Didn’t think so. Les Bleus are playing the best of any team in the tourney so far, and they completely overwhelmed the Swiss 5:2 in a game which wasn’t that close. The French are absolutely terrifying – big, fast, young, athletic, aggressive and skilled at seemingly every position on the pitch. This stampeding counterattack late in the 1st half pretty much destroyed what was left of Switzerland, who were already rapidly disintegrating:

Now that is how you run the break

The French have been somewhat surprising, and yet they really shouldn’t be. I’ve been watching the international game ever since Spain 1982, and throughout that time, France’s biggest nemesis has always seemed to be France. Their propensity for dramatic self-destruction is legendary. My thought was that the absence of Ribéry from the lineup would hurt the French tactically, but I’m wondering if it is helping them mentally. Ribéry was a breakout star in 2006, the final salvo from the most glorious era of French football which came to a rather inglourious end in the World Cup Final. Ribéry is also one of the few holdovers from the disgraceful French showing in 2010 – a team which, in chemistry and attitude, seems lifetimes away from this one. If anything, one less connection to the South African mess is one more notch for the good.

Benzema is making all the plays right now up front, both in terms of scoring goals and picking out the right passes. When skill players get hot, the confidence can spread through a team like a wildfire, and this team is on a absolute rampage, as they've scored 26 goals in their last seven matches. A French team truly playing as l’equipe has few equals in the world game, and the world should be a little bit nervous right now.

4. Slugfest
The Lose love the tenacity and competitiveness of the Big H, and appreciate their passion and zealotry. But, c’mon guys, you have to play some football at some point. Honduras appears to have come to Brazil intent on just being ruthless, cynical, and downright nasty in the way they go about fouling people. They’ve managed to get away with it so far, in the sense that they’ve only had one player ejected when they could’ve had about 5-6 in those two games. It’s clearly a tactical decision, since they seem to just foul anything that moves, and continued doing so today against Ecuador, when they got dinged for a reckless challenge all of about 4 seconds into the game. The referee had his hands full with this one, since the Ecuadorians weren't in too good of a mood. There were plenty of stoppages.

What’s puzzling about this is that all of us here in the CONCACAF part of the world have seen the H play some good football before. In The Hex last year, they beat the U.S. and the Ticos at home, and won a game vs. El Tri at Azteca. There is some talent on that team which has played at high international levels, even though they are somewhat simplistic in their approach to the game. It was something of a shock when the H concentrated on playing football long enough to score a goal at 31’ v. Ecuador today – their first World Cup goal since 1982. Had they continued to lead and continued to foul, I imagine tempers would’ve wound up flaring, as it was clear that Ecuador wasn’t thrilled.

In the end, Ecuador found their composure and netted a 2:1 win, but I’m still not sure why exactly Honduras thinks this is a particularly good strategy. Well, obviously, they think it’s the only way they can compete and that they keep getting away with it, but at 0 pts. and -4 and needing a miracle to advance, perhaps some rethinking is in order.

4 Thoughts Please!

Yes, this actually happened

1. Oh, for fucksake
England played well in their first match, a 2:1 loss to Italy in which they were good but the Italians were just a little better. Uruguay, meanwhile, were awful against Costa Rica, losing 3:1 and getting run into the ground by the Ticos. Whereas England showed some verve and positivity while slogging the Manaus morass, Uruguay were exposed as being slow, old, and cynical. This is basically the same team which finished 4th in South Africa in 2010, and unlike the fine Uruguayan wine I had at The Official Wine Bar of In Play Lose, this group hasn’t aged particularly well. So all signs were pointing to an England victory today, with the exception of one slight problem.

England were involved.

The Three Lions controlled the pace v. Uruguay, dominated possession and eventually even managed to set Rooney up for a chance that not even Rooney could miss. And Uruguay, meanwhile, were reduced to fielding basically two full-time players who are any good (though, to give props, flaky Uruguayan keeper Muslera had a good match), one of whom – lethal striker Luis Suárez – isn’t exactly an unknown commodity. He plays for Liverpool, so all of the Three Lions play against him in the EPL. Hell, some of them play with him in the EPL, so they know what kind of player he is. He isn’t the sort of player you should, oh, you know, lose track of on the field.

Which England did. Twice.

It’s not like Suárez did anything brilliant on his two goals, although his header on the first was quite nice. Both times, he mozied down the center of High St. while a tourist masquerading as an England centre back was enjoying the sights of Brazil – the second of which, featured in tonight’s gif, was absolutely ridiculous.

So it’s Uruguay 2:1 England and it’s an utterly inexcusable loss. And I’m sure that this will somehow wind up being Rooney’s fault, given that Fleet St. and English football fans love killing their idols. England always seem to be unable to choose between older players they don’t really like and younger players they don’t think they need. They still have a nonzero chance of qualifying for the second round, although they’re going to need some help. Given how frail Uruguay has looked for the better part of two games, this was a wasted opportunity.

2. The best defense is a good offense ... sometimes ...
Two of the most exciting teams in the tourney so far are Chile and Colombia, both of whom like to press up the pitch. Way up the pitch. Way, way, WAY up the pitch. Chile wants to create chaos and turn every game into a track meet, while Colombia’s front seven is stacked with exciting attacking talent. That aggressive mindset paid big dividends today for Los Cafeteros, as they pounced all over a Côte d’Ivoire mistake in the back to score a second goal. Both of these teams have pragmatic reasons for playing this type of game, however – their backlines are, well, lousy. It didn’t matter against Spain, but Chile’s defensive shortcomings managed to nearly undo all the good they had done v. Australia in their opener. They now face the Dutch who, even without the suspended van Persie, will like their chances with the Chilean backs somehow trying to track down Robben. As for Colombia, their response to taking a 2-goal lead v. the Elephants was to promptly let Gervinho waltz through the defense unabated and cut the margin in half. From then on, Los Cafeteros seemed to think the best way to protect a slim lead was to have five guys pressed 80 yards up the pitch. Some more coherent work from the Côte d’Ivoire up front would’ve properly punished Colombia for their sloppy work. I’m all for attacking, and these teams are really great to watch, but you have to be able to get some stops if you want to go deep in this tournament. Just play a little defense here and there. Not much. Just a little.

3. The Elephants in the room
I said above the Elephants needed more coherent play. I think a better choice of words would be more selfless play. That team played today like a bunch of guys who don’t like each other. Lots of very selfish play, particularly in the last third and especially after they’d fallen behind. No one wanted to make that extra pass or extra run, when it was obvious from the lax Colombian defense that plenty of space was available. The Elephants will still likely advance, given that they play Greece next, who are godfuckingterrible, but this continues to get in their own collective way and prevent the sorts of results they should be attaining. It’s no big deal if guys don’t like each other on a team. Quite honestly, it’s pretty normal. (Read this article to get a better picture.) So get over it and play some football. Win the damn game and hate each other later. You can blame the guys you don’t like for the losses, but in the end, you still lose right along with them.

4. Sinking in the East
There has been talk in recent years, off and on, of expanding the World Cup to 40 teams. One of the beneficiaries of this would be Africa, which I’m in favour of, since I think the quality is there if only they can get past all of the politics. The other big beneficiary, in terms of gaining more places in the tournament, would be Asia, but if the performances in this tourney are indicative of the quality of play in the AFC, they may merit fewer places instead of more. The three worst games of this tournament all involved Asian sides, the last of which was today when Japan drew 0:0 with 10-man Greece and pretty much couldn’t hit the ocean from a boat. Iran seemed to think that you should have 10 men behind the ball even when you have the ball, and I have no idea what South Korea was trying to accomplish. To be fair to those three teams, all three of those horrible matches ended in draws, and 1 > 0, but never once did you think any of those three teams were capable of winning. The only AFC team to show anything in this tourney has been Australia – who are already going home. FIFA’s worldwide initiatives to grow the game have worked in CONCACAF and in Africa, and Asian sides developed well in the aftermath of S. Korea/Japan 2002, but now they seem to be horribly regressing.

3 Moments of Noise

Only the 2nd stupidest thing Cameroon did today

Tonight we present three moments of noise, one for each of those fallen sides who will soon be leaving Brazil. Because this is In Play Lose, of course, and it is important that we return to our mission by focusing upon what definitely was weak this week. And we don't want to have a moment of silence, because that would just be a bunch of blank space. So let's make some noise!

Australia
The Socceroos deserve plaudits and high fives for their spirited performances v. both Chile and the Netherlands – games which were closer than, by all right, they should be. Australia played with class and competed like hell against what look to be two of the better teams in this tourney. Given how awful they were looking in the run-up to the tourney, that they pulled it back together was certainly commendable. The talent just wasn’t there to get them further. I’m not really sure where the Aussies go from here. They certainly made a splash in 2006, when they were out-and-out-jobbed against the Italians. They seem to still be living off that glory, however. This team was already too old and slow in 2010, and it hasn’t really gotten any younger. Fortunately, they play in the weakest of the world’s regions, so there is ample opportunity for trial-and-error going forward on the talent front.

Cameroon
Jeez, guys, there I go pumping your tires in my praise of African football last night and you go out and do that today? When Alex Song decided at 40’ to elbow Mandzukic in the back and get himself tossed, the only thing that I could think was that he was doing so because he wanted to get tossed and get as far away from this mess of a side as soon as possible. The Indomitable Lions showed some good stretches early on v. Mexico, but once El Tri started scoring goals – albeit disallowed goals courtesy of Mr. Magoo over there acting as linesman – this team just sort of caved. Which, really, isn’t all that surprising. In Simon Kuper’s excellent book Football v. the Enemy, which should be required reading about all LOSE readers, he spends a considerable period of time and pages on Cameroon – a bitterly divided nation where football, much like seemingly everything else, is rife with corruption, division, and politics. This team seems to regularly have the talent to reach this level, but lack the cohesion and continuity to do anything more than meekly exit. Sure enough, this year they showed up late, the players bickered with each other, they bickered with their federation, and they weren’t any good in the end.

Such a dysfunctional ending as we saw today seemed rather appropriate. This team caught a huge break drawing Tunisia for the African playoffs, who backed in thanks to this mess. Egypt and Burkina Faso were better teams who got worse draws. It was always going to be tough for Cameroon, but today they completely disintegrated, and now they get to be fodder in a few days for a Brazil team likely to be in a really bad mood. Good luck with that.

Spain
I posed this question the other day in the preview: what did it say about the state of Spanish football that Atlético de Madrid – a collection of castoffs and loaners and discount buys – had pipped Real and Barca in La Liga? I mean, no diss to Atlético at all for winning, but given how much of La Furia Roja ply their trade for those two big clubs, such substandard (by their standards) finishing in La Liga made me wonder if something wasn’t quite right on the Iberian. Well, I guess we have our answer.

Soon after Xabi Alonso’s penalty gave Spain the lead v. the Dutch, the Oranje launched two long balls – one to Robben, one to van Persie – both of which were fractions offside. Those types of passes were very un-Oranje in nature, but both of them suggested a lack of foot speed in Spain’s defense. The Dutch then did it twice more, once right before the half and once soon after the break, both of which resulted in goals. The Dutch had figured them out, and heaven help you on the football pitch if the Dutch figure you out, as no team so mercilessly exploits opposing weaknesses. The Dutch not only destroyed Spain 5-1, they possibly also destroyed the entire way Spanish football will be played from hereon. The Oranje can publish that blueprint and collect royalties after that thorough and rather systematic stomping.

I could understand del Bosque’s notion to change things up today in an attempt to find a spark, but that lineup against Chile was downright bizarre. It just wasn’t going to work against a Chilean team that attacks, attacks, and then, when they get tired, attack some more just for the fuck of it. Spain, as presently constructed, are old, slow, unathletic and passé.

There sure were a lot of pundits predicting a Spain repeat as champions. The LOSE himself, while skeptical of such predictions of Spanish glory, still had Spain ranked #5 going into the tourney. This begs the question, in retrospect: what on Earth were all of us thinking? Spain went with what had been winning them championships ever since 2008, and you can certainly see why they would think to do that – if it ain’t broke don’t fix it and all – but the response from teams to the quick pitches and the high heat has been to emphasize youth, tempo and athleticism. I’m not sure anyone was expecting the game, itself, to change this rapidly. It’s almost like basketball on grass out there at times. Spain lack physicality up front and foot speed in the back. They’re still a bunch of midfielders passing it about between the boxes – and once the back 8 of the Oranje’s 5-3-2 clamped down on that midfield, and they starting throwing long bombs to Robben and van Persie running fly patterns, Spain was in big, big trouble.

I’ve loved watching this team over the past six years, as they’ve played a style never seen before – one which played both offense and defense at the same time, threatening opponents while simultaneously driving them mad through constant possession of the ball. Never have 1-0 games look so dominating. They’ve certainly got good young players (Spain won the European U-21s in 2013, after all), but a quick look at the rosters of France and the Netherlands and Belgium seems to indicate that the future was now. In that sense, Spain may actually be behind at the moment. And we certainly need to toast Spain for six years of pretty spectacular, championship football. I will drink to that, for sure, although I don’t need many reasons to start drinking. And something tells me we will be toasting more fallen sides here soon. Maybe even as soon as Thursday ...

4 Pennies for Your Thoughts

Dr. Strangegloves

1. Mexico wins 0-0!
Ochoa was a beast. His brave performance kept it level and earned El Tri the point. El Tri seem to treat goalkeepers in the same Flavour-of-the-Month manner that they treat coaches, so Ochoa has been bouncing in and out of the lineup for years. He’s had a strange career. Not only has he suddenly established himself as the #1 guy in Mexico, but he’d be wearing the number 1 shirt on the World Cup Best XI right about now as well. And El Tri need that stability and that sanity. That was an outstanding effort today to take a point in hostile territory, but Seleção always do bring out the best in Mexico, as El Tri have had more success vs. Brazil across all competitions than pretty much any other nation has.

2. Brazil loses 0-0!
Quite honestly, if this tourney wasn’t being played in Brazil, I would expect this team to go out in the 16s. Even at home, Seleção still might. Before the tourney, I would’ve suggested that there were maybe only 4-5 teams who realistically would’ve thought they had a chance to beat the Brazilians on their turf. After these two games, that number is probably closer to 10. To be blunt, Scolari’s system football worked in 2002, in part, because the tourney was so bad. Lots of teams were injury prone, moving up the schedule wrecked preparation time for others – and Brazil still had better players than anyone else. If they have better players than anyone else in 2014, well, Scolari might want to put them in the game sooner than later. The highest level of Brazilian soccer has always seen the triumph of imagination, creativity and grace – if Plan A didn’t work, they’d run through Plans B-Z until they found one that worked, and usually did so within a few possessions. This team’s m.o. seems to consist entirely of Neymar inventing something out of nothing. After that, they seem out of ideas. El Tri showed today that Seleção truly are vulnerable, even on their home pitch, and given the way clubs have been aggressive throughout this tourney so far, it seems unlikely a 16s or 8s opponent – one which likely played confident, attacking football to get them to that point in the tourney – is suddenly going to become scared of playing Brazil. Which I think is an excellent development, having watched opponents cower before the Brazilians for much of the past 30 years. Brazil could still very well win this tourney, but they are truly going to have to earn it.

3. If it's Tuesday, it must be Belgium
The Belgians had the sort of match going today which can make you hate the game of soccer. It can be a cruel game, and chasing a game can be among the most frustrating of sporting endeavours. The Belgians held the ball for 70% of possession, outshot Algeria 17-3, but there they were looking at a shock defeat with 20 minutes remaining, as Algeria’s one shot on target had found the way into the net. But once they got the first goal at 70 minutes courtesy of Fellaini – captain of the World Cup’s All-Hair Team to be sure – the second seemed almost a certainty. Which is sort of how it felt like it would go last night in the U.S.-Ghana game – and thus, the quick response by the Americans and the U.S. win seemed even more shocking in the moment. The Red Devils are everyone’s “darkhorse” and “surprise team” this year, so much so that the only real surprise surrounding Belgium would’ve been if they’d lost this match. Given the hot garbage that passed for a 1:1 draw between Russia and South Korea later in the afternoon, it would appear the Belgians have already survived their toughest test in Group H.

4. Afrolicious
The Fennec Foxes acquitted themselves well in defeat today. They are a savvy side, much more European in style of play than the other African sides (which I suppose makes sense, given that so many of the players grew up in France). With the exception of Nigeria, all of the African sides have looked good so far. As I’ve documented before, I love me some African football. I really would like to see more slots allotted to Africa in the World Cup, since I do think the quality is there to back it up. What would help the CAF to plead that case, of course, is more positive results in the tournament, which continue to be hard to come by. The Elephants are in a good position to advance, and their game with Colombia should be terrific. And I actually think Ghana poses some interesting problems for the Germans, given that they’ve got so much speed and the Germans have been reduced to playing four centre backs in their injury riddled back line. (Of course, Germany will pose big problems for Ghana as well, since the Black Stars had all of five minutes in the game vs. the U.S. they needed to defend, and couldn’t mark the grass they were standing on.) Cameroon was always going to be up against it, but they had good moments early v. Mexico. I won’t even pretend to guess what the Nigerians are doing.

On a related subject, the Official House Band of IN PLAY LOSE has a new record out. Buy this record. It is 100% guaranteed to raise your household level of happiness.

happy thoughts, 4 of them ...

That Was Quick

I will give no thought to Iran and Nigeria, since Iran and Nigeria gave no thought to forming an actual game plan for the 0:0 cure for insomnia midday.

1. 34 seconds
A good way to get over your opening game jitters is to score :34 into the game. This created a problem in that, from then on, Ghana was chasing the game, which is what they do well with the kind of athletes they have. That they spent 81 minutes doing so may have been a part of their undoing, as that’s a long time to chase a target, and when they got to 1-1 they had to play defence, which they didn’t do very well, which is why they were chasing the game for 81 minutes in the first place.

There were about 4 U.S. guys open on that corner. Beautifully executed set piece.

2. 3 points please
I read a few places online that the U.S. weren’t the better side in this game. Those places are wrong. The U.S. made the plays to win, and Ghana failed to make the most of their possession and chances. (And, furthermore, I have no idea why a] Boateng wasn’t starting for the Black Stars, since he wrecked the U.S. midfield upon insertion, and b] why they didn’t try to get Asamoah more involved early on, since he is probably their best all-around player and was stuck playing left back while the Black Stars ran constantly down their right side of the pitch.) The game is often about being resourceful and tenacious. Once Altidore got hurt, the game plan sort of went out the window, but the U.S. still found a way to win the game. There are no ugly wins ... there are no ugly wins ... and this was not an ugly win. Ghana certainly made it tough, because Ghana are really good. It was a great game to watch.

3. Let’s make it 6 points, shall we?
I’ve thought from the original draw that Portugal were the ‘easiest’ game for the U.S. – easiest in the sense that they are the easiest for the U.S. to match up against. My best case scenario for the U.S. in this Group was to get a draw v. Ghana, focus on finding a way to beat Portugal, and then figure it out in the third game. Well, now … shit, aim high. 6 points means you’re almost certainly through to the 16s. 6 points means house money, means you can try all kinds of shit vs. the Germans and see what happens, means that you can really start to think big. It went nearly perfect today for the Americans.

4. Speaking of Portugal …
Portugal were horrible today. That was a total disaster. They lost 4:0 to a beat up German side who only had to put in about 45’ worth of work. That game said a lot more about how bad Portugal was than how good Germany is. Portugal may be #4 in the FIFA rankings, but they’ve never passed the eye test. Having the world’s #1A player masques that they have a lot of pretty average players. And Ronaldo doesn’t look fit – he wasn’t that difficult for the Germans to mark today, and seemed like he was only moving half-speed at times. Portugal lost Pepe to a stupid red card, lost two more players to injury, and now have to run through the molasses in Manaus against a U.S. team which, even with their own injury woes, is considerably more fit at the moment, and which also seems to have been specifically designed to run at the Portuguese.